Voltron Got Served!

You all know how I love the "You got Served" genre of movies. Something you may not know is that I also love Voltron. I think I found heaven.

Yummy Farts???

This is a conversation I had with a buddy at work via instant messenger. There was no prior conversation. The first message that popped up on my screen is the first one you see below. It was to perfect of a conversation not to share with everyone in the world.

Gibson, Sean says:

I just farted and it smelled like an egg mcmuffin...

Tittle, Christopher L says:

excellent

Gibson, Sean C Civ USAF AFMC 416 SCMS/GUMAA says:

it kinda made me hungry

Tittle, Christopher L says:

that is disgusting. I think you have just set a precedence on that. Farts generally don't make people hungry

Gibson, Sean C says:

haha... well if you farted egg mcmuffins you might get hungry too

Tittle, Christopher L says:

you have a good point. come let your next one rip over here and see if the girls start craving an egg mcmuffin

Gibson, Sean C Civ says:

haha... i some how doubt that will fly with them. Maybe with Hutzilla (that is what we call my lead who also has a gas problem)

Tittle, Christopher L says:

probably. chances are it smelled like ass and you are just craving an egg mcmuffin, but that is just a guess

Gibson, Sean C says:

negative... i wasnt really hungry till i farted.

Tittle, Christopher L says:

wow. amazing

Tittle, Christopher L says:

that is a gift my friend

Gibson, Sean C says:

i should try to get mcdonalds to hire me and go around farting in crowded areas

Tittle, Christopher L says:

you do it anyway, might as well get paid for it

Gibson, Sean C says:

good point

Hope you enjoyed that! I am sure the people around Sean did not did not enjoy his fart as much as he did. Good times!

Must Go- Idaho Edition (mostly)

Idaho- Expect for Boise, Idaho fucking sucks. I was up there for a three weeks for a work trip to Mtn. Home Air Force Base. Every where I have stopped in Idaho is either windy as hell, or smells like cow shit, usually both. Boise is pretty cool though. They have bikini mechanical bull riding at one bar and all you can drink for $9 dollars at another. They also recycle like it is the law. Props to Boise for making the most of their situation.

MPH Check- Have you seen these signs on the side of the road that inform you that if you are so fucking bored driving through Suicidaho that testing the accuracy on your speedometer will help pass 45 excruciating seconds. These are ridiculous. There is no good that can come out of this stupid test. “HAAZAAH! My speedometer is perfect, finally I can get some sleep.” Or “Fuck me, I am driving through Idaho and now my speedometer is off, just kill me now.” I guess one positive is that if you are driving in Idaho and you have a stop watch handy it is a strong sign that your life has taken a turn for the worst and it is time to start re-evaluating your goals.

Hunting- I have noticed that people up here in Idaho like to kill things. Maybe that is the only way to keep form killing others or possibly them self. But there are these tiny little squirrel looking things that people apparently love to shoot. They are like wild hamsters. I don't see the point in killing all these animals. But that is just how I have always been when it comes to killing things (except drifters). One kid up here was disappointed because he didn't get his permit to kill a moose. Why in the hell would you want to kill a moose. Doesn't make much sense to me. It is not like there is a Moose infestation, I just cannot imagine killing one for sport.

Dogs- I don't care if you live in the middle of nowhere or Idaho, if you have dogs keep them off the damn road, and by road I mean highway. Nothing like cruising at 65 and slamming on your brakes because there is a dog in the road. I would not have a problem with this if it had happened once, but it has happened like 4 times. Put your stupid dogs away, especially at night. It is hard to see them and I don't want the guilt of hitting a dog with my car. By the way, I do like dogs, I just don't like hitting them with my car!

Me- From Idaho. I am home now, see I comply with the must go list.

Shopping Carts- This one is over due and is universal. People, for the love of holy deities start putting your shopping carts in the designated cart return spot. Stores dedicate a prime parking spot as a cart return for a reason. Stop being so damn lazy and just leaving the cart in the little gap in between your car and the other cars surrounding yours. Last time I checked nobody enjoys scratches and dents on their car. So quit being so lazy and walk it over to the cart return so it will not go rolling into someones parked car. Please?

Locking Doors- Locking doors actually needs to stay and actually increase. While in Idaho I was at a small eating establishment (it was a bar) and I needed to go to the little boys room. This is a one person at a time restroom. I go and open the door, sure enough there is some redneck in there taking a piss. Hey asshole, I am not in the mood for a public pissing contest, lock the fucking door. The same situation happened to me at a nice sushi restaurant in Salt Lake. Classy place. I go to use the restroom and sure enough, there is some jackass (you know who you are!) in there with his junk in his hand. We are trying to have a society here, so if a bathroom is made for one person and you are in public, LOCK THE DOOR!

Flight Line

Last week I got to go out to the flight line and help get the jets ready for take off. And by help, I actually mean hang out with the crew chief while he points to things while I freeze my ass off and try to avoid getting knocked over by the 45 mph wind. It was pretty fun, but I had to wake up at 5 am to get out there and it really was cold. All said and done, it was an incredible experience that not many people get, at least not without being in the military.

This is the crew chief I spent half the day with. He is out of the AF in two weeks and also hates Mtn Home.

The guy of tho far right was under a jet and a gust of wind knocked him off balance. He ended up cutting his head open on the jet and had to go get stitches. Fucking wind was out of control.


Here is a video of "my" jet getting ready to go to the runway just before take off



Here is the take off.