Sex & Baseball; Baseball & Sex

If you know me at all you know that I frequently use baseball analogies to describe all things dating and sex related. This is not unique by any means. I might say that I hit a homerun with a female; unfortunately I failed to go around the bases. I just hit the ball, pointed at it leaving the park (I really am kind of a pointer, sorry to all offended strippers), and then went and just sat on the bench as opposed to rounding the bases. I will often refer to girls as throwing me curve balls, or walking me to first base, or just lobbing me an easy one right down the middle where all I need to do is swing. Then there is the Grand Slam... never mind; you get the idea.

Anyway, something strange happened the other day while listening to sports talk radio. A local sports personality, David Locke, was talking about steroids and other performance enhancing drugs in baseball making the sport fake. And you know what he used as his analogy?!? SEX! He compared baseball to sex. He said baseball has become that platinum blonde with big fake boobs, fake nails, and a mini skirt, etc. You get the picture (if not see below). We have all seen this girl (I usually point at her). When she first enters the scene she in nice to gander at, but when you spend some time with her you come to realize that there is nothing really there, she’s not that interesting. It is nice to look at for a few minutes, but spend anytime with it and you will grow tired of how counterfeit she is and move on to something else. There is no substance there. This is what baseball has now become; a big blonde hussie!